Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Flashing Lights

I'll admit, I have been grum-py lately. It seems like every day it's something new that pushes my buttons. I've tried to just deal with it as best I can, but I'm not always great at "being a duck."

I never considered myself an emotional eater, either. I'm just an eater. But after a rough day last week, I called a friend of mine and asked if she wanted to meet at Chipotle for dinner. I also mentioned how close Cold Stone was to Chipotle and, with or without her, I'd be making a stop there, too, before going home. It was a hard sell, but she caved and we ate every bite of our burrito bowls and ice cream creations.

As much as I hoped that that day was the worst, or at least the last, in the streak, I was wrong. I'm fairly certain that a good portion of it is my fault. I think too much for my own good, but at the same time, the issues that are really getting to me are valid. I guess I just have to now figure out what, if anything, can be done about it. And if you know me, you how awesome I am at sitting back and waiting on things.

Tonight, after working a little late and treating myself to some Sonny's Drive-Thru deliciousness (even though I wasn't exactly hungry. see what I'm saying about the eating? it's sick.) I was greeted at the entrance of my complex with flashing lights. There were no less than 15 fire rescue vehicles lining the only way in and out of my apartment complex. For a minute, I wasn't sure if I was even able to drive anywhere close to my building, much less if I was allowed! After passing several uniformed men and none of them telling me to take a hike, I proceeded with caution. Now, I pass a place that sells (and decorates?) emergency vehicles on my way to and from work every day. It was as if they were having some sort of super sale in my parking lot!

I wish that I had some really good details about what the actual problem was. There wasn't anything on the news about it when I got home, but maybe they were waiting to see if another old lady fended off a carjacker before going with the apartment fire story. All I was able to figure out is that one of the building caught on fire. I don't know what the cause was or how much damage there is now, but I did see water pouring out of a couple of apartments.

The craziest thing is that when I saw all of these firetrucks and everything, I never once worried that maybe it was my apartment. I don't want to say that I was more concerned with just getting home and eating because I was worried about whoever is now out of a home, but I did want to just kind of get out of the way. I felt lucky that it wasn't me that has to find somewhere else to live and try and salvage my belongings. It definitely made me realize that things could be a lot worse. I try to remind myself of that, but it doesn't always do any good.

So, at least for the time being, I'm couting my blessings. I'm thankful that my home is safe (though I have little water pressure). I'm thankful that my family is always there for me, no matter what. I'm thankful that tomorrow marks the half-way point in my brother's mission and that he's doing great. I'm thankful that I don't have to sleep on the couch anymore just because of my stupid bruised tailbone.

I'm sure that there's a lot more that I have to be and am thankful for, but that's all I've got right now. And I'm sure that this isn't doing anyone but me any good anyway. Perhaps on Friday I'll be thankful to be taking a vacation day. My co-workers will probably be thankful not to have to deal with my cranky self that day, too.

Fingers crossed.

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